SPIN THE BOTTLE :]

24th of OCTOBER 2008 i don't know what to feel after this day.. it was mixed emotions.. i'll tell you what had happened in a few minutes.. first things first.. this day was the joint birthday of Daniel and Abby (friiends) Well.. we ate.. we talked a lot.. we shared jokes.. it was the reunion of II-Pasteur 07-08.. We laugh and laugh.. we enjoyed our get together..

Then as time passes, it was past 7 when we decided to play SPIN THE BOTTLE. random persons were asked different questions.. they were asked to say only the truth.. first person to be asked was Kj i think..(first or 2nd, it doesn't matter) well.. i was the one who asked her.. "Naka move on ka na ba kay Gb?.." it took her a little while to answer.. then finally said "oo" OK.. spin the bottle! then there was a question raised..

i forgot what was asked to the others so let's move.. the bottle was turned again.. now it pointed to him.. to dB.. i started to become nervous.. i know what they're going to ask him.. and then.. the question came out from Abs.. she asked him.. "kay tinay.. meron parin ba o wala na.. kung wala na, cno?" when i heard those questions... i wanted to shout.. i wanted to get away from that place.. i don't wanna hear his answers.. but then.. i have no choice.. then it came out from his lips.. "Di ko alam kung wala na, pero c toooott " no!!!! I've heard it.. i don't know what to do.. i don't know how to react.. but for some reasons.. my heart had hoped a little.. that there's still a feeling for me.. even a bit.. i was somehow happy.. (but happier maybe if he have said yes..)

The game continued.. everyone was asked.. except for me.. ( maybe the bottle hates me.. hha ) They started saying.. "Yung mga tinanong ni tinay, magtatanong dn sakanya.." then HE said.. "unfair nman un para sken.. di nya nman aco tnanong e.." (they've said that coz i was the one who always raised questions for them.. except for him..) He then added "Ako magtatanong kay tinay.." My heart beat like lightning.. i was so nervous.. i didn't thought he would want to ask me.. but then.. he did.. "Ako parin ba o hindi na? Kung di na, cno?" I can't move.. it seems like the whole world stopped.. i don't know how to answer back.. but then.. i wanted to know the truth so i need to tell him the truth.. i know that he himself know i still love him.. but i was wondering why he still asked.. though i don't know how to say it.. it slipped from my mouth.. "oo" Abs then added, "e ano nman sayo?" he replied "wla lng.. gsto ko lang mlaman.."

Our friends started again.. they say "Gnito nlng.. kaung dlawa nlng ang ttanungin nmen.." then they were singing "Muling ibalik... " Both of us were speechless.. then we thought of having a rotation of question instead of spin the bottle.. we had it counter clockwise.. in that manner, i would be the last one to be asked.. so there and then.. questions were started to be raised again.. then it's his turn to be asked.. i don't know what came into my mind.. i said "Ako magtatanong" He himself was shocked.. maybe he didn't thought i would be brave enough to raise a question to him.. I didn't also think i could.. But as i've said.. i wanted to know the truth.. so i asked.. "Nung enrollment bket mo cnabi un? c tooooott na ba nun?" he answered "Ndi.. wla pa kay tooooott nun.. ayoko lng mangyari ung mga bgay bagay.. kse dba.. di nman tau pero ung mga gngwa nten lagpas na.."
OK i've heard what i wanted.. that's all.. then.. it continued.. i won't be putting everything as what happened.. it will take more space.. i'll just put in the questions that were asked to us..

(q1 for me, asked by monay) "Bket cnabi mo na si Gb na?" --answer-- "xmpre.. alanganamang sbhen ko na nssktan aco.. edi kunware nlng c Gb.."

(q2 for me, asked by chaba) "Bket sbe mo dti c Gb mahal mo.. tpos pnagpatuloy mo pdin ung sa inyo di dB?" --answer-- "xa mahal ko nun.. crush co lng c Gb.. bket.. xa nga andami dmi nyang crush nun e.. pnapatanong nya pa sken mga pangalan nila.." (he was shocked i would say those then laughed a little then turned his back on me.. but he returned again after a few moments.)

(q3 still for me, asked by chaba) "Nung mga times na gnun.. nawala ba ung kay dB?" --answer-- "ndi.. namanhid lng.."

(q4 for him, asked by abs) "Bket nung nsa tricycle kau ni tinay.. nung bday ni mariel.. bket mo gnawa sknya un.. bket humiga ka pa sa blikat nya tas ssbhen mo wla na?" --answer-- "Kasi meron pa khet konti."

(q5 for him, asked by monay) "Bket nung nlaman mo na manliligaw c jason at crisanto kay tinay, bket sbe mo sken gsto mo pigilan.." (mariel added - "oo nga.. sbe mo pa nga it hurts") --answer-- "Kasi nga nung mga times na un meron pa khet onti.." monay again: "e bket di mo pinigilan?" he replied: "huli na kse.."

Then.. after the game.. everyone was quiet.. i could see their blank faces.. different thoughts were running on each other's mind.. it's late.. it's almost 10pm.. we were tired.. then someone spoke up.. "Uwi na tayo.."
They started to stand up and go inside the house.. packed their things.. fixed their hair.. powdered their faces.. then with smiles on our faces.. we went out of the house all together.. we bid our goodbyes and ride our vehicles home.. though secrets were revealed.. I'm happy of how everything turned out.. it was great..

OMG!!!

EXAM WEEK :D lol. haha. though it's our examination week until Friday.. i find reviewing B-O-R-I-N-G.. i only review minutes before the exam.. so i can remember things.. I'm used to doing that.. i have none much to say about this exam thing.. i just wanna post something new.. hhe :D And besides, i can't think of anything to do before i take a bath and go to school.. so.. i decided to share to you this post. aun.. none much to say.. guess i have to shut down this computer.. goodluck. GODBLESS. :]]

HAPPINESS IS FREE :]]

What a wonderful day.. well, today was one of the happiest moments in my life.. things began to stay in place.. arguments were settled.. and once again.. we (my pasteur friends) got a get together at dessa's crib :] (great, isn't it?)

First, between me and my "anak" I was disappointed with her these past few months because of some misunderstandings and the thing we call "L-O-V-E" We started to ignore each other months ago.. But, of course.. each of us gives up in time.. and i gave up.. not because of anything.. but because of one simple reason.. i wanted things to go back to where it should be.. I've had enough of this little quarrels and misunderstandings.. and i want things to be settled down.. and so.. I've decided to accept my own mistakes and hope she would also accept hers.. and lucky for me... she did. :)

Second, my friendship with my (almost best?!) friend Cha.. We also had an argument.. with an ALMOST the same reason with my daughter (anak, ung nsa taas /\).. I thought she ignores me because of the fact that she LOVE my past so much.. I thought she have decided to ruin our friendship because of that.. well.. wrong thoughts.. but then again.. things were settled.. sides were explained.. everything turned out great.. happy ending! :))

And that L-O-V-E thing.. i got used to it.. and as what i've said in my last post.. i've let go of that someone.. i've learned from what had happened to my relationships with my friends.. and i would never want those to happen again just because of foolishness. :D i've processed everything in my mind.. i've had enough..

THE ART OF LETTING GO

Yea.. I've let him go.. i just couldn't stand the pains i've been through.. Holding on is being brave.. but when time comes and he really isn't gonna come back.. when he is already inlove with somebody else.. don't be a fool.. learn how to be a soldier.. "knows when to fight.. and when to surrender.." (credits to john phillip carmona - for the quoted part, xa nagparealize sken nyan e :])

Well, i guess i'll be better in time.. i just need to accept facts.. and be open minded.. i need not to close my eyes to reality.. haayyys.. i hope everything will be in place.. things will be fine.. and i hope what i did was the best thing.. i hope i've made everyone happy..

Before i end this post.. i wanna show my gratitude to the people who helped me overcome my problems.. who was there when i was alone.. who took care of me when HE wasn't there.. thank you my friends.. ( esp. marga and abby)

And also for the last time.. i wanna thank Delfin R. Bajar Jr. for letting me feel loved.. thank you for hurting me back so that i've learned my mistakes and would never want to do them again.. i wanna say SORRY at the same time.. for hurting you before.. i'm sorry if i've made so much damage in your heart that made you never wanna try to love me again.. after all, you've made a good decision.. But always remember.. that i'll stay here no matter what.. caring for you.. "I'll keep a part of you with me.. :) "

And to end this.. here's a song fitted to this post..

THE ART OF LETTING GO

Put away the pictures, put away the memories
I put over and over through my tears
I've held them 'til I'm blind, they kept my hope alive
As if somehow that i'd keep you here
Once you believe in a love forevermore
How do you leave it in a drawer

Now here it comes, the hardest part of all
Unchain my heart that's holding on
How do I start to live my life alone
Guess I'm just learning, learning the art of letting go

Try to say it's over, say the word good bye
But each time it catches in my throat
You're still here in me and I can't set you free
So I hold on to what I wanted most
Maybe someday we'll be friends forevermore
Wish I could open up that door

Now here it comes the hardest part of all
Unchain my heart that's holding on
How do I start to live my life alone
Guess I'm just learning, learning the art of letting go

Watching us fade, what can I do
But try to make it through the pain
Of one more day without you

Where do I start to live my life alone
I guess I'm learning, only learning
Learning the art of letting go

YOU ARE MY SONG..

This morning, i was surprised when i woke up with droplets of water in my eyes. All i remember was a dream.. where i was singing a song.. a song i wanted to sing to him.. He was watching me singing that certain song.. and as he sit there and watch.. tears suddenly run down my face.. i can't help it.. but still i managed to finish the song.. then burst into tears..

I realized i wanted him back in my life.. i wanted him to come back to me.. but how? i dont know where to start.. rumors tell that he has another girl.. i wanted to fight for him.. but if i do.. will he appreciate it? or he'll just blame me?

I never thought i would be hurt this way.. well.. before anything else.. i would like to share to you the song i sang in my dreams.. it's entitled: My First Love. Though he's not my first love, the song was really related to what's happening between us. here it is..

My First Love

Once in a while
You are in my mind
I think about the days that we had
And i dream that these would all come back to me
If only you knew every moment in time
Nothing goes on in my heart
Just like your memories
How I want here to be with you
Once more

You will always gonna be the one
And you should know
How I wish I could have never let you go
Come into my life again
Oh, don't say no
You will always gonna be the one in my life
So true, I believe i can never find
Somebody like you
my first love

Once in awhile
Your are in my dreams
I can feel the your warm embrace
And I pray that it will all come back to me
If only you knew every moment in time
Nothing goes on in my heart
Just like your memories
And how I want here to be with you
Once more
yah yah yah

You will always be inside my heart
And you should know
How I wish I could have never let you go
Come into my life again
Please don't say no
Now and forever you are still the one
In my heart
So true, I believe I could never find
Somebody like you
My first love
oh oh

You will always gonna be the one
And you should know
How I wish I could have never let you go
Come into my life again
Oh, don't say no
You will always gonna be the one
So true, I believe I could never find
Now and forever

OCTOBER 4, 2008 :]]

MAYMAY PASAWAY
composed of:

tinay.marga.julianne.ashley.keren

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INTRODUCING:
"MAYMAY PASAWAY"
in their first ever single entitled
SANLIBONG MILYA
(thousand miles - tagalog version)

I
Naglalakad sa daan
Nagmamadali
Mga mukang nadadaanan

II
Nakatulala sa wala
Gumagawa
Ng daan patungo sa lahat

REFRAIN:
Ika'y kailagan
At namimiss ka
At iniisip

CHORUS:
Kung mahuhulog mula sa langit
Ang oras ba ay lilipas
Kaya kong lakarin
Sanlibong milya
Para lang makita kita

BRIDGE:
Ayoko, ayoko na malaman mo
Na.. ako'y, lunod sa alaala mo
At ayoko pakawalan ka pa
ah.. Ayoko..

REPEAT I&II
REPEAT REFRAIN
REPEAT CHORUS (2x)

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